Archive for the ‘Bad Walkcycles’ Category

Hopefully this woefully low-detail model is in fact the scale-relative design of an RTS game to be viewed from afar at only a few pixels in height - the distance may hide the lack of cycling, sliding feet and immobile root.

Making a new record for minimalist movement, this 2 keyframe beauty, (admittedly with 3 on the feet), is notable only for it’s sheer lack of animation. Perhaps the animator was in a hurry to make it to his latest speed-dating meet up - clearly a man with little patience for learning anything about depth or character.

The irregular placement of the penis on the face of this alien race must in part cause the painful hitching on every right step, but more importantly those well sculpted buttocks are kept in shape by incredibly strong thigh and calf movement, giving the otherworldly impression of ankles that can resist taking the full weight of this creature in every stride.

It is presumed that the creator of this piece saw a “cartoon” at some point, and decided to create a “cartoony” walk full of character and bounce. This little boy’s under-developed arms flop around in a reverse motion that is topped only by the appaling asymetry of the forward momentum, while squash and stretch should be applied to more than just the neck.

It’s likely that the animator has never witnessed a woman in movement outside the gyrations of his collection of bite-size .avi downloads, (note the model’s poly-soaring attention to detail around the breast area). This genetically enhanced female has spent so much time at the gym with WBW 26 that her arms swing in reverse and her legs can never straighten - but it’s worth it for shoulders like those.

Would the dead really rise in such a manner? The incredibly flexible upper body betrays the IK spline spine rig, which, while allowing for easier access to dynamic posing, provides unnatural results when animated - unless that is desired?

The alsoran hopes to god that the reference for this work was taken from someone working out on a ski exercise machine - that might explain the linear hand movement and torso tension. Thankfully the excellent rig was illustrated at the beginning, divulging the secrets of the creation of this masterwork - apparently you can never have too many pole-vectors.